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Sasuke 29 Spoilerific Review - Part 9

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Sasuke spoilerific review ;) Warning.. incoming blog of Sasuke 29.. if you don’t want to know.. you have been warned :D (Just remember.. the USA Broadcast of this.. will be.. well probably never honestly. Yes.. you read that right.. Now with the death of G4 official and NBC not giving a damn about Sasuke Japan (especially after boycotting Sasuke 28 AND Sasuke 29..).. we may never see Sasuke Rising on US television (or any overseas country for that matter unless everyone buys the original 3 hour broadcast from TBS). For a preview of this event.. Please see SASUKE Rising (29) NAVI a half hour review of Sasuke Rising with fluff pieces of all the major players in the upcoming Sasuke and even a couple of runs that were cut from the official broadcast!

(Massive thanks to TBS for posting the names of all 100 competitors!  Thanks to Ube for his help on the names in English!!)

 The massacre continues.. we tried to kill 16 people but 2 escaped our grasps /TBSShakesfist
 Oh so help me I'm going to be throwing things if he fails not of his own doing..
 FIRST you Fast Forwarded him.. okay he's going to have a full run. I waited SIX YEARS to see him.. I would have sent flaming dog poop to the studio if they Fast Forwarded him again..
 TBS trying to stem the damage by giving me a Fluff piece. For those people who still don't recognize him he was/is a trampolinist.  And no he never got to the Olympics.
 For those who only watch Ninja Warrior NOW he should be recognizable. He was the Finalist in Sasuke 17 that Nagano won.
 After his management had a tiff with M9 we haven't seen him in SIX years. Now he's all grown up and working at a local Gymnasium.
 AS A COACH (Shaking fist at Yamada for being derisive towards all coaches) to cute little kids.
 Trying to take a page from Kongo's midget army.. Shun is building his own army.
 You're welcome girls.  Still not my type but I can appreciate he's now legal.
 Sasuke 17 Finalist Shunsuke Nagasaki長崎峻侑
 Clear on the Cross Slider
 moving quickly between the rungs and turning around
 safe on the other side
 I mean he was part of the group that were introduced to the Salmon Ladder during Sasuke 18 so it's not like I expected him to drop here.
 There we go!  nice time too
 Still don't like this joke of an obstacle.. but I save my hatred for later..
 spider walk
 ... holding breath now that I see the time..
 in the water at 20 seconds left..
 diving deep
 hitting the fire hose..
 managed to one hand the support raiting..
 ......... starting to get my computer to the point of being thrown..
 hoisting computer in the air...
 as I'm staring at the clock and he's lifting the first wall..
 and under..  I'm officially royally pissed off..
 I'm so sorry they did this to you Shun.. between the damn tank and the 45 second cut for no friggin' reason.. you were ROBBED! He kicked ass in this tournament and has nothing to show for it.
 He can't believe it either.. that was a near flawless run.  Any other tournament he would have been in the 3rd stage again.. He should have passed but TBS screwed this up badly..
 Asa's turn.. wait.. no interview from Shun either.. /facepalm
 I can't take out my anger on Asa.. he's done nothing wrong.. he better not get unjustly eliminated either..
 TBS successfully killing someone else..
By the way.. I'm now completely convinced we had so many Fast Forwards in the first stage so we wouldn't have any attachments when they were unfairly eliminated now. Shame it backfired because the favorites we wanted to watch managed to get here so it because so OBVIOUS how totally wrong this stage 2 was this time around.
 Next is (Shin Sedai) New Generation star Kazuma Asa朝一眞
 so help me they better screw this up for him.. or anyone else past this point..
 easy clear on the Cross Slider and doing good time on the Salmon Ladder so far..
 Other side good
 flying through this..
 easy clear on the Swap Salmon Ladder
 doing well on the Joke obstacle
 doing good time on the spider walk
 HERDS of time before he even touched the &%#$@ tank..
 in he goes with just under 40 seconds left..
 .. it looks like rapids when you get closer to the fire hose..
 powered through and got the support beam on the first shot
 ... break to commercials..
 20 seconds left before he even gets into the chute..
 sliding all over the place trying to get a grip on that weird wall..
 it drops on him as he throws his body forward..
 butt pushes the walls apart..
 having issues with the last wall as he's soaked and the klaxon blaring in his ear..
 he just says screw it and throws his body forward as the wall lands on him as well..
 scrambles forward and totally jacks the timer in frustration.
 Kazuma Asa朝一眞 - SECOND STAGE CLEAR!
 man he worked hard for that one.. this is ridiculous... this should be an easy clear with a high time.  What is wrong with that? NOTHING..
 Yuuji officially crapping a brick. He's not a good swimmer and he saw how hard it was for BOTH Kongo and Asa to get a clear both in red..
 Asa Family&Friends plan™
 Sister Sayuri さゆり
 Asa is still kicking his feet in celebration and agony..
 A scream of elation that it's over and he survived the attempted murder..
 Asa barely cleared because he was successful in getting around the fire hose and snagging the support beam in one shot.  THIS is how precise you have to be under these conditions.
 trying to lift the last wall since he was not happy about Morimoto just sliding under.
 He at least managed to get it high enough for him to throw his body under it with the wall slamming on his hip.
 I love how defiant he was.. he probably came really close to BREAKING the red button in frustration.
 Sister Sayuri さゆり approves of this message
 Asa can't even breathe.. so to recap.. the clears are 0.8 seconds.. 5.1 seconds and 4 seconds.. W.. T.. F..  it shouldn't be THIS close..
 Meanwhile vagabond Kanno is hoping he has a chance.. if he's perfect..
 I can't believe she's stupid enough to wait for him.. sorry.. but she's STUPID.  Waiting to get married because of a game show is just asinine.  I'm now officially calling Kanno "Yamada 2.0".
 "Yamada 2.0" Hitoshi Kanno菅野仁志
 Clear on the Cross Slider and first transition
 clear on the next transition
 and the next
 Clear on the Swap Salmon Ladder
 joke of an obstacle
 good time on the spider walk
 going to be close with him entering at 33 seconds..
 he's electing to go from the top..
 manages to grab the support beam on the first try..
 he's going to have to hustle.. he's taking his goggles off his eyes
 THAT is how you do the wall..
 Using his arms and not his butt to open the wall
 and to prove he can do it he lifts the last wall over his head
 barely clearing again.. Another near flawless run and we are only at 3.8 seconds left?  This is crazy.
 .. this is sad.. don't cry stupid.. just ditch him for making you wait.
  "Yamada 2.0" Hitoshi Kanno菅野仁志 - SECOND STAGE CLEAR!
 All of you are accomplices.. you know that.. don't you?
 I'm going to hound him on twitter if he doesn't marry her before Sasuke 30..
 Meanwhile by far the weakest swimmer in Sasuke's 2nd stage who just happens to be a cliffer as well..
 as we remember from last time.. could he have been warned not to wear his shirt?
 because he it would drag in the water
 and cost him precious time?
 I think so because he's top nekkid now..
(Shin Sedai)  New Generation star Ryo Matachi (Cliffer #2)
 Clear on Cross slider and first transition on the salmon ladder
 clear on other side as he turns around
 and again
 Clear on the Swap Salmon Ladder
 .. I really don't like this obstacle.. bring back the 2nd plank.. otherwise it's a joke.
 Doing good on time on Spider walk
 normally I'd be happy seeing a full 30 seconds before the water..
 But Ryo can barely swim..
 as evident by the near drowning as he gets closer to the fire hose..
 he's now literally trying to avoid drowning and is going back to the start.. 
 Hioki trying to will him into going forward..
 he's trying again by kicking back out even though he has no hope..
 he can't do it.. stream is too strong for him (mental note.. he PASSED the one from last year.. and he can't handle this year's even backed down from earlier competitors)
 replay of him almost drowning.. I'm not kidding folks.. how is this fair to non-swimmers? This is NOT the triathlon
 Ryo Matachi (Cliffer #2) - Death by bias
 16 murders down.. 4 escaped the grasp /TBSShakesFist
 okay.. I will pitch a living fit if they take him down.. so help me I'll implode..
 HE TOOK SWIMMING LESSONS YOU EFFIN TARDS..
  2-Time Grand Champion Yuuji Urushihara漆原裕治 (Cliffer #3)
 Clear on the Cross Slider and first transition of the Salmon Ladder
 doing excellent
 and excellence continuing
 Clear on Swap Salmon Ladder
 reminding TBS how much of a joke this thing is..
 Flying through the Spider walk
 OVER 40 SECONDS..
 okay.. doing good.. he's going down.. he trained for this..
 he's been pushed up already..
 almost there.. just grab the support..
 He missed the grab of the support beam and.. HE'S GOING BACKWARDS..
 WTF.. HE'S GOING BACKWARDS!  PUSHED backwards. not swimming backwards!
 They can't BELIEVE what they are watching..
 ALL that time training.. ALL that time blowing through the first 2/3 of the course faster than abyone else.. only to be cheated this way.
Kouji's voice going super sonic
You don't treat anyone this way.. much less your 2-time grand champion.
 Seriously.. for the MORONS online that think that THIS was acceptable because they didn't want him to win again..
Anyone with even a remote sliver of sportsmanship would see this as a travesty. The way these long-time veterans are feeling right now.
 HE NEEDED A LIFE GUARD!
  2-Time Grand Champion Yuuji Urushihara漆原裕治 (Cliffer #3) - Death by complete and utter bullshit.  TBS SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF THEMSELVES..
 And for those in the internet that tried to defend TBS on this.. Seriously internet.. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!!?  THIS was acceptable?  You ought to be ashamed of yourselves. Go back to ANW where NBC doesn't care about you either. At least the Japanese who are causing a living firestorm in Japan see it for what it was.. complete and utter bullshit.. They want a certain person's head on a stick.  For once I'm not defending him.
 The 4 who dared defy the TBS assassination plot..
Yusuke Morimoto森本 裕介 
Kenji Takahashi高橋賢次
Kazuma Asa朝一眞
 Hitoshi Kanno菅野仁志
 NOBODY cleared with more than 5 seconds left..
 Back to the room.. I literally got up and had to walk around so this was the first time I saw this I was so furious.. NEVER have I been so incensed.. I mean there's a difference with disappointment over my favorites loss.. and another to see such a clear injustice.
 Obviously they are talking about the Backstream calling this stage "Survivor"..
 okay.. I like him.. He literally said (referring to the Backstream)
"Hon to ni Baka" = "this is Seriously/Really Stupid/Idiotic"
 Then after describing why he hates the Backstream he gushes on the kid going to the 3rd stage for the first time.
From this point forth I'm employing the drinking game for everytime I hear "Sasuke-Kun". Trust me you'll be dead in about a minute.
Oh yeah.. we have a 3rd stage now..


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